BOUNDARIES IN RELATIONSHIPS



Hey good man, here with an Authentic Talk Note. We talked about in group this

past week about the idea of boundaries and how does that really apply to our

intimate relationship? Or our number two relationship?


Well it's really important that we understand the importance of unconditional love.

One of the guys in group was really mentioning that “hey you know I want her to

feel the grace and unconditional love that I feel for myself, that I've learned to

love myself and I want that to flow into our number two relationship.


So that she knows that she's not only as good as what she does or how much care

she gives to our kids or how she doesn't work or the house and you know all the

different things, our sexuality.


All those things can become transactions if we're not careful. So really, you know,

an experience of unconditional love is very important he said. However it's not

about just whatever you want to do like our generation, our Millennials and post

Millennials.


Are really saying it doesn't matter, it's whenever you want to do there's no

structure needed and that couldn't be further from the truth. Intimacy comes from

boundaries; it's a place of Health that you've got to say “this is what I consider to

be good for me and good for us and these are my boundaries that I want us to

engage in. I want us to be considerate of each other I want us to have our own

time, but then also pursuing each other”


There's things that are absolutely off limits, we can't just say “everything goes”,

there are things that are healthy and things that are unhealthy and making sure that

we have our own principles, our own boundaries for our self and then also

bringing those to the relationship will actually encourage intimacy.


CALL TO AUTHENTICITY!


Intimacy is actually not possible without these boundaries because then it's just

another relationship that we don't care about the outcome. So really looking at that

is the Call To Authenticity today. What are your boundaries in your own personal

life? And what are your boundaries between your relationship?


It can't just be that “hey unconditional love no matter what, you can do whatever

you want”. We've got to look at this and say what's important to us? And what are

we inviting people to?


It's not putting up walls and saying “you better do this.” No it's an invitation to

this is what I want a relationship to look like because this is what a relationship

looks like with myself knowing that unconditional love is the foundation of all of

those things.


CIRCLE OF RELATIONSHIPS AND S.P.I.E.S


All right as far as Circle Of Relationships go to talk about the number one and

number two to our personal life and then, how does that go into our number two

relationship? Our intimate partner or a significant other?


And then as far as the S.P.I.E.S go really looking at how are we thinking things

through in our intellectual health? What are our principles? Our spiritual health?

Do we know that we're a good person without our performance? And our

emotional health how do we express those things to our intimate partners? Alright

there's our ATN for today, hope you have a great one. We'll talk to you next time.

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